Today is America’s Independence Day, which begs the question: What the hell are you doing here and why are you not outside eating, drinking, and semi-coherently playing Wiffle ball?
Oh, what’s that? It’s too humid? You’re staying inside and watching “Independence Day”? Well, I guess we can’t fault you for that — you’re not a real American if you’re not lazy.
And, on a similar note, we’re not an online publication if we don’t try and come up with something relevant for you to read and watch today. So thank you for reading our obligatory holiday post. We have a some videos for you to pass the time if you really need to.
Here’s Epic Meal Time’s July 4 tribute to meat, America, and most importantly, “Assassin’s Creed 3.” Note the clever attempts at promoting the video game throughout the video. Also note the wonderful assortment of meats the dudes (who we profiled recently) grill. It’s the type of spread we should all aspire to, and not just on Independence Day.
What’s that? You want more branded videos? Seriously? You’re not kidding? Well, alright. Check this one out from Virgin Mobile, which is apparently giving away $100 to anyone who switches to their carrier service. To celebrate that, the company unleashed hundreds of Benjamins (get it?) across New York City to do all sorts of things, some of which you should definitely not show to your grandmother (or show it, we don’t know, your grandmother might be cool).
And finally, because we love Independence Day and “Independence Day,” this. Always this:
Happy 4th, everybody.